Before Happily Ever After
by forgottenmage
Summary: What would happen if you had a curse that said you would kill everyone you ever loved? This messed up Sleeping Beauty of course. Ch. 10 up! SasNaru, male pregnacy
1. Chapter 1

Hello and welcome to the amazing mind of Lou. This is my first story published. I am currently working on a joint project with Lies-14, so please check out her work.

**Warnings- This is Yaoi, I will repeat, Y-A-O-I, that means Boy-boy, slash, etc. although the only real mention of in is in the first couple of chapters. Don't like it don't read it and don't flame.**

**If you do flame me, be courageous enough to leave your name so I can see what you've written.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Sleeping Beauty.**

**And now on with the story**

**XxXxXxXxX**

We all know the story of Sleeping Beauty.

The king and queen have a beloved daughter, have a shindig forget (_cough, cough refuse)_ to invite evil fiend. (Cause 'ya know those things are real party people), evil gal curses baby, glowing spindle and all that jazz.

That's all well and good, but that's not what really happened. I should know, I was there. In fact I was more then there I am the daughter of the King and Queen. Except this story isn't really what you'd expect. In fact it's probably the opposite.

XxXxXxXxX 

I heard the story so many times it's second nature tome. Lets get this straight off the bat, my parents aren't what you'd call normal. My Dad, Naruto was named the ruler of our village eat a very young age. This title, called Hokage, was given to him at the age of nineteen.

My mother, erm, well that the funny part. I don't have one. See the weird thing about my dad that I didn't tell you is he has a demon sealed inside him. A minor oversight is the Kyuubi is female, yeah opps,.

Along with strength and healing abilities the nine-tailed also granted my Dad the ability to get pregnant not matter the partner, enter my other Dad, Sasuke Uchiha.


	2. Chapter 2

**Yayay, thanks to all who've read before (I can't find it so I don't know were it is)**

**This is my first story so I'm still getting used to how to make it look pretty.**

**OH, goodness, I forgot.**

**I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR SLEEPING BEAUTY; THIS GOES FOR THE FIRST CHAPTER TOO.**

**Now on with the show**

**XxXxXxXxX**

You know when your little and you have a crush on the boy or girl in your class. Well if you a girl (I don't know how you guys think, and you say we're complicated!) you carefully sigh over the hunk from a distance, and when your around said boy of your dreams, you either ignore him or smack him outside the head.

That was the case between my parents.

My Dad, Naruto, was a spaz, obsessively challenging Sasuke and declaring them rivals.

My Father, Sasuke, was the more mature one. He just ignored Naruto to piss him off.

However they both took the, _slap-the-crush-so-they -don't-know-what-your-thinking_ thing, a little to far.

That's the understatement of the century.

Sasuke almost killed my dad and left to go serve the evil snake-bastard, Orochimaru.

Naruto didn't give up on Sasuke though. He rescued Sasuke and dragged him back to Konoah. Everything was all fine and dandy until Tsunade found them making out in the forest.

They were married when they were twenty, one year into my Dad's reign

However there was one problem, and his name is called Sasuke's ego.

XxXxXxXxX 

After my only Uncle's death, and my parents' marriage, it finally hit them that they were both guys and lacked the necessary equipment to make babies.

Yeah, and to think my Father was the smartest in his class.

Despite Sasuke's protest that he didn't want children anymore, Naruto slowly sunk into depression (In the case of my Dad this involves going down to the level most consider insanely happy). Until one night Naruto didn't come home. Sasuke went mad, ripping through the town in search for his husband. He finally found his beloved sitting in the rain, sapphire eyes uncharacteristically devoid of any emotion.

XxXxXxXxX 

(_Flashback)_

Sasuke stared and Naruto, lying crumpled on the ground, the rain almost hiding the tears on his face. Naruto looked up at his husband and smiled, trying to hide his pain and stood shakily.

"Hey Sasuke-bastard, what are you doi-"

Naruto stumbled back, hand flying to his jaw that was already swelling from were Sasuke had punched him.

"What the hell was that for Sasuke?" Naruto screamed. Sasuke ignored him and kept on attacking until Naruto was forced to retaliate. Finally, Sasuke ended up pinned between and tree and Naruto.

"Now tell me, what is your problem?" Naruto hissed, his eyes fading back to their normal crystalline. Sasuke's eyes too slowly lost their red tint form his bloodline ability. Sasuke struggled against his capture, and Naruto slammed him into the tree. Sasuke glared at his love eyes narrowing dangerously.

"What's your problem, Dobe?"

"What-"

"You don't think I've noticed. You've become more and more distant from me. Spending more time at work till you didn't even come home."

Naruto blinked in confusion, and his grip slackened. Suddenly it was Naruto pinned to the tree and Sasuke was the one leaning down to capture his gaze.

"If this is about the baby, so help me I will kill you." He hissed.

Naruto struggled to reply

"But Sasuke, having a baby is your dream,"

"No" Sasuke interrupted "You're my dream. I don't care about kids anymore. We can adopt for all I care, just please stop running from me."

"Sasuke." Naruto muttered but was yet again cut off, this time more efficiently by Sasuke's lips.

XxXxXxXxX 

At this point o the story, Naruto turns and interesting shade of red and starts stuttering. Sasuke smiles and looks off into the distance. My Uncle Kakashi offers to tell me what happens next and gets whacked on the head.

Lets just say, one month later, Naruto found out he was pregnant.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you to all who reviewed. Umm, not really all but hey it's the thought that counts.

**For all you who didn't review, here's some inspiration, my first review ever was and Flame. I replied to the flame really nicely if I say so myself. Yes I was shocked too, that reviewer is still alive.**

**My joint story is up. It's under the author Lies-14, and it's called Shoma, Inc.**

**Please review, because it makes us happy.**

**Disclaimer: do not own Naruto, only this really weird version of Sleeping Beauty.**

**WARNING: THIS IS YAOI, LAST CHAPTER IS AS BAD AS IT GETS, BUT IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT DON'T READ AND DON'T FLAME ME. AND PLEASE DON'T ACT ALL BETTER THEN ME; YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME.**

Thank you.

XxXxXxXxX

According to the story, when the king found of that a prick of a spindle would be the demise of his daughter, he burned every spindle in the land. Thane he banned every sharp point object for fear that it too would cause death.

Well, the good news is my village is totally spindle free. Not that I would go within five miles of one under threat of death

The bad news is my village is a mercenary town totally comprised of ninja of ninja in training.

In other words, a whole lota sharp pointy things.

But that's okay because the storytellers got it completely wrong, I wasn't destined to die or sleep a dreamless sleep. I was destined to forsake my people and kill the ones I love.

Like father like daughter. No?

XxXxXxXxX

I was born late April, the twenty-fifth to be exact.

My Dad Naruto says its easy to remember because at the time he was twenty-five.

My father then muttered, it was easy for him to remember because Naruto was in labor for twenty-five hours and would not let him touch him for twenty-five days.

I was not named Aurora or anything stupid like that.

I was named Kakuri Uzumaki Uchiha. (1)

However it is true that people came form all around the world came to a party in my honor. It's also true that I was given gifts at that party

However, little fairies with wings, totally off.

I was given gifts form family and friends.

Lets see.

Tenten gave me a beautiful engraved Fuuma Shuriken.

Her Husband, Neji, offered a scroll of jutsu.

Lee gave me a pair of bright orange leg weights. I think my father still has them hidden somewhere.

Hinata gave me a dark blue baby blanket, which she weave and embroidered. Who'd thunk it?

Her husband gave me a puppy; thankfully Kiba decided it was better to give me a normal one.

Shino, hmm, I don't rightfully know what he gave me.

Ino gave me a painting, which hangs in my room

Chouji supplied that food for the gathering.

Shikamaru gave me a puzzle box that I still use to hid things in.

My uncle Kakashi got me a wooden box that wouldn't open until I was eighteen. When my father found out it contained an orange book he burned it. Than Kakashi gave me the real present, by far my favorite. It's a simple little black choker with a piece of metal hanging down. My parents have matching ones. The charm is interchangeable and whenever it is changed, the partners let off a faint heat and glow blue.

His boy friend gave me a baby album and pictures of Naruto form when he was a kid. I would have been fine with a free-homework pass but whatever.

Sakura gave me a slew of healing scroll and stole a fanged scroll form her former sensei.

My father tired to bar Dad's sensei form coming. However, Jiraiya super-pervert somehow managed to come. Under the watchful eyes of the Uchiha he gave me a stuffed animal shaped as a frog.

Tsunade gave me a beautiful Kimono that I would not grow not for many years. Later she would tell me it was my grandmothers.

And I think that's it form leaf village, besides some trinkets. After all it's tradition that the parents do nothing for they will be caring for the brat for the next eighteen years and counting.

The village form sand also gave gifts before anyone could stop them.

Kunkuro gave me one of those things that hang above a baby's bed. Later is life it turned into a marionette.

Temari gave me a fan. I'm told she snorted and said it was fitting. Later she would teach me how to use it. They were by no means as big as hers two ordinary looking fans.

Gaara was last.

My dad would tell me later it was so quite that you could hear a grain of sand drop, and it did. Gaara sent this sand in my cradle, examining me. Its funny, but I kinda remember it. I remember that hot sand swirling around my body. Even as a baby, I was not afraid, I think that's why Gaara and I got so close. It seemed I measured up to his expectations because he dropped his gift and walked away.

It was a gourd, small in size. It contained sand, which obeyed my will and protected me when my guard was down. It was by no means as powerful as Gaara's but it served. It also helped that Gaara could not control it.

And that's about it. People talked, ate, congratulated my parents, and left.

Oh yeah, wait your right. I was cursed.

Opps, silly me I forgot.

XxXxXxXx

So, what do you think?

Yeah the name

I thought up that name of the top of my head. I looked it up latter, Ka has several meanings, including beautiful. Kuri means chestnut. Put them together and you get…isolation and despair. I thought about changing it but decide not to. It fits her life.\

The birthday. YES APRIL TWENTY-FIFTH IS THE SUPERIOR DATE, (my birthday too in case you didn't figure it out)


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Three of Before Happily Ever After**

Thank all of you who review, you guys rock, I would give you cookies but my sister ate all of them.

Yet again I am forced to remind you that this is a yaoi story, don't like it don't read it and don't flame.

**My joint story is up under Lies-14, please read it and comment on our sanity.**

**I have decided to update once a week, if this is to slow, please tell me.**

**Oh yeah, I no own Naruto, thank you.**

**And now on with the show.**

**XxXxXxXxX**

Okay, where were we? And they live happily ever after right?

No? Darn.

Yeah the party I know. Okay so every one had just finished giving their presents when the creepy music stared, dark green clouds rolled across the sky. In the distance a woman screamed and a baby cried. The fairies all huddled together in fear.

For those of you exceptionally dim witted, I was being sarcastic.

The music stayed as it was, the sun was still shining, the bird chirping, and everyone was smiling and laughing, and not even an evil laugh.

A small poof of smoke announced the appearance of a man behind my father. It was one of the ANBU squad. He bent and whispered in my dad's ear and everyone slowed. Naruto's face paled and he turned towards my father.

"They say they're sorry but there was nothing they could do."

Sasuke's face, if possible, paled even more. He stood, whether to fight or to run I would never know because he then fell to the ground screaming in agony.

The giant doors swung open and in strode my soon to be curser.

Darn where's the Jaws music when you need it?

XxXxXxXxX 

I think now would be a good time for you to go out and enjoy life, make some tea, talk to you parents. Maybe read that book you've been meaning to, taking up spelunking, paint a picture.

No, you're not going?

Good cause I didn't either.

Lets see, my father is rolling on the floor screaming in agony, my Dad can't protect me because some idiot got him pregnant and he just spent twenty-five ours in labor.

That adds up to a whole lota painkillers.

So there I was, the poor defenseless baby. Oh, wait I forgot about the fifty plus bloodthirsty ninja in the room.

My mistake.

Not that it did me any good. Everyone was frozen. I don't mean in fear, I mean frozen as in a Popsicle but without the ice. No one in the room besides my parents could move a muscle.

So we are all there, tense, waiting for what happens next. (Actually I think I was sleeping, besides when you'r that young your eyes can't focus on anything anyway)

In strides my worst nightmare and the bane of my existence,

"Why Sasuke-kun, Naruto-san you forgot to invite me. Why I am deeply offended" Draled Orochimaru, standing as greasy and creepy as ever.

XxXxXxXxX 

**Thank you, next week the plot thickens. Oh yeah, I don't speak Japanese and I was introduced into the manga world a few months ago. So if anyone can please tell me when you use the endings (-Chan, -san, etc.) it would be most grateful.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello friend. **

**I was just sitting here and thinking of all the things I have to do today, and decided to type up the next chapter.**

**Aren't I spledifouirs?**

**Oh, yeah, thanks to my reviewers**

_**Kusuri**_

_**Jess the Pirate**_

_**LIES-14**_

_**B.J Sanders**_

_**Raikouinazuma**_

_**Zolu**_

_**One Last Tree**_

**You guys are uber cool! Special thanks to those who put me on their fav. list "_They like me they really like me!"_**

**Clarification: Naruto is called Dad and Sasuke is called Father. These are two different names for two different people because calling them both Dad would be confusing, believe me I know I have seven Grandparents.**

Disclaimer: NO I do not own Naruto or any movie references I may quote in this messed up story.

XxXxXxXxX 

Some girls are afraid of heights.

I jumped off a fifty-foot cliff when I was four; I broke two bones put I jumped.

Some girls are afraid of bugs.

When I was seven I used a jutsu I learned from Shikamaru to enlarge a spider and sick it on my Aunt Sakura.

Some girls are afraid of what others think.

Me, I have a; you either hate me or love me attitude.

Some girls are afraid of dishes.

I just think that's weird.

Lastly, some girls are afraid of snakes.

I don't fit into this category; my fear is too big for it.

For years I refused to learn many jutsu because they had the hebi (serpent) sign in it.

I also refused to go swimming in moving water because in my mind water is mind up of lots of squiggling lines.

Squiggling line snakes.

However I believe my fear it totally rational.

Not that the fear of dishes isn't, but I have yet to met one girl abducted by a spoon.

Me however… well what do you expect from a girl whose one dad is demon possessed and father is an insane, power hungry pyromaniac?

XxXxXxXxX 

Orochimaru, one of the three legendary sannin had come to give me a birthday present.

Yay me.

Oh, wait that's bad isn't it?

"Sasuke," He continued, "Do you really think I would miss such a monumental occasion? After all we are talking about the sharingan heir, this truly is a historic event. To think that this little girl will soon grow up to be the most dangerous nin in all the land. With her fathers bloodline ability, brains and powers. And her other fathers… well we won't dwell on that. Really it's a shame that you won't be around to see it."

And with that the slimy haired git reached down into my cradle.

XxXxXxXxX 

Have I ever told you how much I love Gaara?

If the was twenty years younger, I think I would have married him and have his insane little monsters. Or at lest kidnapped him.

Alas we can't always get what we want. Besides, Sakura beat me to it.

Gaara and I have always had a deep bind. He was one of the ones who helped raise me seeing as I spent most of my childhood in Sand for 'protection'.

Gaara was the first one I went to crying because I boy had called me goofy looking.

He was also the first one to kill said boy, followed quickly by both of my parents.

Gaara was with me when I got my first tattoo, the kaji of 'wind' on my right shoulder blade.

He was also to one who distracted my Dad so his wife, Sakura could give my dad medial treatment, when said dad had a heart attack over said tattoo.

But the real reason I love Gaara is because he saved my life.

XxXxXxXxX 

Where were we, ah yes.

Darth Vader was reaching down to kill Luke, wait no wrong story.

Orochimaru was reaching down to Kakuri (me)

Everyone is staring at me, hoping against hope they had regained control over their muscles.

By this time, I am awake.

I stare at the snake guy and do the only thing I can,

Blow spit bubbles and laugh, (I'd like to see you do better).

Orochimaru wrinkled his nose in disgust and started to pick me up.

A large barrier of sand leaped in front of me.

Way to go Gaara.

XxXxXxXxX 

Yes, Gaara's sand leaped in front of me a spared my life.

Except it wasn't Gaara's sand, it was mine.

The sand form the small gourd lying at my feet sprung to protect me.

See, your parents are wrong. **Not **getting presents **can** mean the end of the world.

Yeah but as always there was a problem. The sand form my gourd was small and not that strong, it wouldn't protect me forever.

Why, oh why can't things ever go good for the main character?

I guess I'm being a little dramatic. Because the sand did save my life, it made Orochimaru jump back for a second, and a second was all my dad needed.

XxXxXxXxX 

While my Dad is beating the shit out of Orochimaru let me explain something already mentioned.

It was clinically impossible for my dad to move.

He was in labor for twenty-five hours, a fact which he will often exploit to get his way.

The doctors found out latter that Kyubbi and pain medicine don't mix.

How did thy figure this out you ask?

Five doses latter, my Dad instead to give birth naturally.

Yeah, opps.

Of course, Sasuke agreed with Naruto, after all Naruto had his hand.

However for a boy, no baby is natural.

The only reason Dad and I are still alive is because of the Kyubbi's healing abilities.

However, even the nine-tailed can't heal damage that quickly.

Which is why when my dad saw the slimy haired snake-basted (oh, alliteration) reaching down, the demon took over.

And let me tell you this never, never threaten a demons kit.

Hehehe, if only Orochimaru knew that.

XxXxXxXxX 

**Yeah, that's it. This is my favorite chapter, just because of the beginning.**

**Now, I don't want to here anyone say this was too short, eight stinking pages, deal**

**Oh, yeah parings.**

**I've been meaning to do this. I am not for into Naruto so I chose some parings others seemed to like and use them.**

**Neji x Tenten**

**Hinata x Kiba**

**Lee x ?**

**Shino x ?**

**Ino x Shikamaru**

**Choiji x ?**

**Kakashi x Iruka**

**Gaara x Sakura (this happens a few years after Kakuir's birth)**

**And the rest I will leave up to your capable imagination.**

**Oh yeah, on last thing, the fears.**

**THE FEAR OF DISHES IS TOTALLY RATIONAL, IT IS, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT IS ON THAT PLATE YOU EAT OFF OF AT RESTURANTS.**

**Thank you.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello again everyone!**

I am super happy because I just found out how to see how many people have read my story, 1,500 some odd.

**Yayayyayyayaya (fireworks and cookies all around)**

**I've decided to post this early because I have two exams this week, which I have to get above an 85 on. Yes I'm scared too.**

**For all of you who are new to this, I do not own Naruto, anything I might quote form Disney movies, Mighty Python movies, or even Adventures in Odyssey. But don't worry my psychiatrist and I are working through it.**

**I am super sorry but I won't write a detailed fight scene because I am not talented like that. **

**GO READ MY FRUITS BASKET STORY; YOU SHOULD KNOW WHERE IT IS BY NOW!**

**Lurve ya.**

**And now on with the show.**

**XxXxXxXxX**

What are you waiting for, some great word of wisdom?

Okay fine, don't eat yellow snow.

There happy? Good now read dammit.

XxXxXxXxX 

Back to the party, my dad and snake dude had been going at it for a LONG time. Seriously, I know Lord of the Ring movies that are shorter. Okay that may be a little exaggeration, but come on, hurry up and kick his bum already dad.

Well, credit where credits due, Orochimaru had manage to doge the worse of my dad's blows, but Sasuke was starting to come around and Oro-chan knew that the curse seal wouldn't hold him forever.

So he did the only thing he could and fled.

Everyone fell to the floor at the release of the jutus holing them. Sasuke ran to where Naruto had collapsed. Meanwhile, even more sand flew into my cradle and spirited me over to Gaara, aqua eyes daring anyone to protest, no one did. Right now that was the safest place for me.

A gust of wind swirled around the room, Orochimaru might have been gone, but his voice remained (good job Disney, you finally got something right!).

"Don't think you have won little ones. I just wanted to give the little baby a gift. Ah, well I guess a curse will have to do."

Gaara carried me over to my parents. Sasuke claimed me and held me tightly to his chest.

"Daddy's little girl, huh? Well Sasuke lets make that come true. One day your precious daughter will fall asleep. When she wakes up she will kill all that she loves and run to my arms. Fitting no? Try all you might Sasuke you wont be able to break this curse. Until later, my little Kakuri-chan."

The wind left the room. I started to cry, my father tried to comfort me then laid me in my basket, I cried harder.

From underneath my pillow, a small snake emerged and wrapped it self around my right arm, then slowly sunk into my skin.

I would have this for the rest of my life. My 'gift' from Orochimaru. It looked like one of those metal are bands, and snake twisted around my arm, with its head opened and positioned to bite.

Yeah, I couldn't even get a normal birthmark.

Life goes on, at least mine does.

XxXxXxXxX 

Please don't kill me, blame it on my sister.

**Wait, ASHLEY WHERE ARE YOU, DID THE FANFICTION PEOPLE ALREADY GET YOU!(can I have your I-pod?)**

**YES, I know its short, I am very aware of that; so I do not need to be told. **

**I will post the next chapter tomorrow, it just wouldn't go with this chapter, doesn't work.**

**Hehehehheh did you like the first part. I actually wrote that in someone's year book, it always annoys me how some people can write a whole long thing with only a moments noticed. I was so sick of people giving me there's to sign, on one of my friend's I wrote**

**Dear, blah blah**

**Why does everyone keep giving me their books and expecting great words of wisdom, you want wisdom. Okay here it is, don't eat yellow snow.**

**Lou**

**P.S, see you at tennis.**

**Amazingly she didn't like it and told me to write another, I told her that if she gave it to me again I would tell her not to run with scissors.**

**Yes by now, and please don't kill me (if your mad find it tomorrow, I'm sure yu'll like it better with the next chapter)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay, I lied, DEAL WITH IT!**

**Yeah I know I was supposed to update sooner, but I had two exams this week, one for a class I have never taken before.**

**I got a 98! **

**Yeah me. So now I'm happy and decided to share the love.**

**Thanks yet again to all my reviewers, and those who put me on their favorites (I'm too lazy to look all the names up).**

**Heheheh, yeah. A special thanks to kusuri, who has promised to draw fanart for me!**

**I felt so bad that I didn't really know what Kakuri looked like that I drew her myself. It's pretty good if I say so my self, and I don't know how to draw manga so.**

**I'll post that drawing as soon as I have access to the scanners at school.**

**And now back to the show, by the way, the story will slow down a little now that the party is (almost) over, but everything I put is somewhat necessary t me.**

**XxXxXxXxX**

You can imagine how hard it was for my parents when I was little (of course I was an angle when I grew up).

According to Orochimaru's curse, I would fall asleep and kill the ones I loved.

Back at my first (or is it my zero birthday, cause your not really one until next year, hmmm confusing) birthday party they were discussing this.

Only it was no longer a party.

My dad still lay slumped on the ground, unable to move and not responding to anyone. My father was standing by my cradle, trying to protect me from unseen threats. He was ignoring my Aunt who was trying to heal the damage from the cursed seal.

"Tsunade," Temari's voice broke the spell, "can you break the curse?"

Tsunade backed up form were she was standing near my cradle.

"No," she said wearily, "It is was a cursed seal, we might have a chance, but there's nothing, just that snake and it's harmless. It just like Orochimaru predicted it."

"My daughter" my father hissed, "Is not going to go insane."

"I know Sasuke," Tsunade sighed.

"There is a way." Everyone froze and turned to the voice. It was Naruto; head still bent and slumped on the ground.

A ripple of 'whats' ran through he crowd.

Naruto looked up finally and met Gaara's eyes.

The red head took over.

"There is someone here who has yet to give a gift." He said in his normal monotone as he went to stand by Naruto.

"Who?" Sasuke whispered, already guessing.

"Me." Naruto looked up, eyes demonic red. His whisker scars dark on his checks, teeth elongated.

Gaara smiled.

"Hello Kuybbi, long time no see."

Before he too, let his demon out.

XxXxXxXxX 

See, absolutely no fairies what so ever in this story. I just have two demonic godmothers. That kicks fairy butt, Believe it! (Sorry couldn't resist).

Back to the party once more.

Read charka swirled around both crouched figures before diving toward the baby (aka me)

My father would tell me later that I stopped crying and stared in awe at the charka display. Then two tendrils of energy reached down a touched my forehead.

I screamed.

The charka disappeared back into my Dad and Gaara. Sasuke torn between us scooped me up and ran to Naruto. My Dad slowly blinks up at his husband, pain clouding his vision.

"She did all she can for Kakuri. I don't know what she or Shukaku did but its all we got. I'm sorry I couldn't do more."

Then he fainted.

Sasuke kissed his forehead and the turned to do the same to me, that's when he noticed the seal on my forehead.

XxXxXxXxX How was it? 

**Yes I know it isn't that long but it's not my fault. Okay, it kinda is, but I am beautiful and you love me.**

**Every time you push the purple button a fairy comes to life.**

**(Translation- I am shallow and need reviews to keep me going, go on shower me with complments.)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello everyone, and happy Labor Day!**

**I am so proud of you all for not ganging up and killing me for my late update, but alls well that ends well.**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto in any of my lives, past or present.**

**I also do not own Sleeping Beauty, Adventures in Odyssey, Mighty Pythons, Disney Movies Such as The Lion King, or anything else I might quote on accident. Please don't sue me, I just go a job and don't have that much anyway.**

**Wow, I already hate that and now I'm looking at the chapter I'm writing in the future and it's going to be ten time longer. Anyway.**

**Thanks to all my reviewers, all the people who put me on their Alter or Favorite list, **

You light up my life… 

**Yeah, anyway.**

**If anyone wants to draw me fanart I just got one from Lies-14, I am going to scan mine in soon, maybe later this week. But I will put all pictures on my site as soon as someone tells me how to do it.**

**And now on with the show.**

**XxXxXxXxX**

One day when I was older I freaked my dad out.

I went to the hospital and got a dose of those sleeping pills, the powerful stuff that can knock out a horse for five days.

I switched those pills for sugar tablets and proceeded to swallow one and point to the jar and say

"Man those are good, what are they again Dad?"

XxXxXxXxX

To say I grew up a normal would be a lie, but then no one I knew grew up normal.

For the first five months, my parents went crazy trying to keep me awake.

Finally Tsunde screamed at them that I was a baby, I loved nothing except the carrot flavor mush and my stuffed toad, and they could let me sleep.

And so I slept.

Unlike the movie, Orochimaru didn't tell us when I would go insane so when I was three my parents explained the curse to me.

I stopped sleeping.

That's the reason I love Gaara so much.

When I was told that I could no longer sleep, I went tot go live with him for a while ( my family was constantly changing where I lived in hope that Oro-chan wouldn't find me).

Gaara taught me how not to sleep.

I guess it is safe to say that I look a little weird.

My hair is a light blond almost white with black roots and low lights. I inherited my fathers pale complexion, dark eyes with a tint of blue-rimmed Gaara style from lack of sleep.

And of course my rugged good looks I got from both sides.

I do have the infamous whisker scares, but I didn't get them till I was older. It was a sick joke from someone who tired to kill me.

And last but certainly not least, I got my forehead from my demonic godparents.

XxXxXxXxX 

No one knew what the demons had done to me; they just hoped it would be enough.

Tsunde explained that the seal on my head is a sign I'm demon touched.

The seal is black diamond shape with a dark red in the middle.

According to Tsunde, when a demon is fond of a human they would leave such a mark on him or her.

It granted the wearer protection from demons and showed it was a kept human.

Basically it's the equivalent of a dog peeing on me.

XxXxXxXxX 

Although I didn't have a normal childhood I had a happy one.

One of the things that made my father uber happy was the fact that I was a girl.

Apparently girls have less of a chance of inheriting the Sharringan.

No one told my genes that.

XxXxXxXxX 

Although my parents didn't burn everything (okay, Saauke does, but thats just his jutsu) they were very protective.

Very, very, very, very protective.

This might have a little to do with the fact that I'm a little bit of a klutz and our village isn't really baby proof.

Okay, I lied.

I'm a really BIG klutz, but that's okay or at least I thought it was.

But, according to Gaara, being knocked out by my own stupidity is the same as falling asleep.

Man did that sand come in handy.

Since I couldn't sleep I would never often wonder the streets (trailed by ANBU of course) it was on one of those walks that I found the gift my father had given me.

XxXxXxXxX 

Okay so there I was, just a walking down the street….

_Singing do a diddy didy dum diddy do._

Minding my own business.

(No really, the paint on my hands matching the graffiti on the Hokage Mountain, pure coincidence.)

I had long ago lost my guards.

I was walking down the street (hey we've been here before) playing with my sand.

It didn't really occur to me that a normal person wouldn't be able to see each individual sand particles in the dead of night.

I rubbed my eyes, they had been burning for quite some time.

I looked up at the moon and saw a figure jumping the rooftops.

I frowned.

No one besides me is up this late.

I quickly followed him back…

To my house?

Hey, what is that pervert doing in my room?

XxXxXxXxX 

Now a normal person would call for help when they see a dark figure breaking and entering,

I however and not normal what so ever, and the creep was in my room.

However, I knew my parents would not be happy if I got hurt and they could have helped.

I took out my necklace Kakashi had gotten me.

The silver charm glinted in the moonlight. I had changed the symbol yesterday to 'protection'.

I squeezed the charm in my hand a sent a pulse of my charka into it.

Somewhere I knew that my parents charms also glowed and released enough heat to wake them up.

I tucked the necklace into my shirt and slipped into my room.

XxXxXxXxX 

I watched from the shadows amused.

The man in my room was looking around confused, probably looking for where the bed and its occupant was.

I grabbed the closest thing and slip behind him and murmured in his ear.

"Hey stub, I don't think your suppose to be in here. At least you don't look like a girl."

He froze.

Good, mission accomplished. Now all I had to do was wait for my parents…

Hey why are you moving?

XxXxXxXxX 

My captive struggled to turn around.

"What are you doing?" I finally hissed.

He paused.

"Your ANBU right? Where is that girl your hiding? I'll gladly kill the little **CENSOR **for you."

"Now you listen here mister," I was greatly offended by that statement, I am one hundred percent human, well at least seventy-five.

I loosened my hold and suddenly found a kuni between my rids.

I folded to the ground as the poison slowly over took, my body.

"How?" I muttered falling face first into the carpet.

The last thing I saw was my father's worried face before my world turned black.

XxXxXxXxX 

**Exit stage left!**

**IMPORTANT NOTICE- Steve Erwin died today. I probably spelled the last name wrong, but you all know his as the Australian croc hunter. He and that Animal planet show Croc Diaries.**

**We will now observe a moment of silence in his honor.**

**Anyway**

**Very long chapter and they are only going to get longer.**

**Hope you liked it and anyone interested in drawing me stuff, review and tell me and I'll send you my e-mail.**

**Thanks for reading.**

**Lou**


	9. Chapter 9

Hiya folks! 

**Merci to everyone who read my last chapter and reviewed or tried to review.**

**Ummmm, yeah**

**Joyness- No idea what you are talking about. Who had a baby? I don't think I killed anyone…. Yet!**

**Okay, yes I know that normal people can't go so long without sleep. However this I my story and I shall do whatever I like.**

**Yes Kakuri still has eyebrows and the rims around her eyes aren't that big. **

**If it makes everyone feel better, Kakuri can go into a deep level of meditation that allows her body to get the rest normal people get from sleeping, but she is not really asleep.**

**I won't change this because it is super important to my story, like it's the legs the story stands on.**

**Anyway- **

**DISCLAMER- (wow this is not as fun as I thought, its actually a little depressing) I do not own Naruto, Disney movies, Adventures in Odyssey, or Mighty Pythons.**

**XxXxXxXxX**

Hello, my name is Kakuri Uzamaki Uchiha and I just suffered from an assignation attack at the tender age of fourteen.

Bo yeah, my life kicks major butt!

Now back to the show.

XxXxXxXxX 

I groaned as Sakura placed her hand on my wound. It's didn't hurt anymore but why miss such a wonderful opportunity to complain.

Wait, stop, back track.

YES, Sakura is alive. Alive I tell you alive.

Cough, yeah moving on.

I looked around my room and sighed. Maybe I should have left that creep to cause mischief. My room was now crawling with ninja.

Party at my house.

My father didn't seem to have the same idea.

"Out everyone."

"But sir," said one unlucky ANBU member. They all seemed reluctant to leave, and I'm sure that fact that both of my parent were in boxers had nothing t o do with this.

Nope, not at all.

"Out now." Sasuke snapped, his sharingan starting to swirl.

It was like they were never there. I stretched out and smiled at my parents.

"Thanks, they were really getting on my nerves."

My father turned to me.

"You idiot" he hissed.

I froze confused.

"What?"

"What the hell was going through your mind? 'Oh look some guy just entered my room in the dead of night, how about I go capture the assassin by my self using a HAIRBRUSH."

"Well, yeah. Kinda."

"A HAIRBRUSH?"

"Hey, in my defense it wasn't part of the plan. Besides it's not like you let me keep weapons on my room. And how was I supposed to know he'd figure out it was me?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed and he thrust a hand-held mirror at me.

I looked in it confused and gasped.

The mirror-wheel eye bloodline of the Uchiha clan starred back at me.

"Kakuri, you need to know that we were scared stiff. We thought you were dead, we thought…"

It was the first time my dad had spoken since he entered my room. To bad I was POed right then and would take it out on anyone.

"What," I snapped "you thought I fainted, that's all you care about isn't it? Making sure your daughter isn't turned into a weapon. Don't worry dad I'm fine. I managed to survive without your help, again. But what else is new?"

It was a low blow but hey. My parents hadn't taught me how to wield weapons until a few years ago, scarred that I would hurt myself. The only reason they relented was an assassin attack I suffered when I was nine, in a different village that killed my guards, and almost killed me. That was when I gained my scars on my check.

In all those years without weapons to defend myselff I sharpened the only other weapon I had.

My tongue.

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair.

"Sorry dad," I muttered, "I've had a long night."

Naruto smiled at me.

"That's okay," he replied, "we all have."

He patted the spot next to him and I sat down and he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my head.

"But we'll get through it."

XxXxXxXxX 

Bet'cah wondering how I survived the attack, not to mention the poison.

Come closer, it's a secret.

Asante Sana squashed banana! ( the Lion King)

And now for something completely different

(I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay)

Moving on, it's true that the bad guy did get me, just as he pulled out his weapon out my parents entered the room.

Ha!

Take that creepy dude.

My parents don't even let guys I know in my room.

Needless to say the ANBU have another dead body to identify.

After my parents entered the room I did my job, flopped to the floor and played dead.

The truth was that the cut didn't hurt that much. I get worse walking to the front door in the night.

However that poison was another matter.

I was latter told it was a strong sleep medicine, meaning I was targeted.

Gah, being popular has its down falls too.

XxXxXxXxX 

Now lets journey back through time together, to the creation of man.

In the background a creationist fights with a scientist for the remote. While his back it turned an alien from the scientologist mother ship knock the Christian out and carts him away for dinner.

No?

Okay lets skip to the invention of mans worse nightmare.

No, not taxes.

The doctor's office.

Dum, Dum, Dummmmm.

Okay here is a day in the life of Kakuri.

Wake up- oh wait wrong Kakuri.

Me-

Sit around a wait for everyone else to wake up, maybe study some jutsu.

Take a shower and get presentable

Wish my father good luck on what ever mission he has and drag Dad to the office.

Help Dad with the paper work (I get bored easily so I learned to system a looonnng time ago)

Eat a light lunch

Go to the hospital and learn some healing techniques

Throw up

Eat a bigger lunch

Wait, go back

Throw up.

Why do I throw up you ask?

Simple, since I was little my family has been slowly adjusting me to various poisons.

These including sleeping medicines.

GREAT ISOSCELES TRIANGLES, I JUST FIGURED OUT HOW STONE HEDGE WAS BUILT.

Or something like that.

Yeah that's right, my body is adjusted to almost all poisons that is why the assassins medicine didn't work on me.

Yes I know I am a genius.

That means the only way for me to activate the curse is for someone to knock me out.

(Fat chance)

Or fall asleep. Note to self, stay away from physic lectures.

XxXxXxXxX 

**There we go!**

**Yes you may now shower me with complements.**

**Ummm, yeah. Anyway. If anyone noticed I posted two chapters within two day. This is because school starts tomorrow and I will be really busy.**

**Really, Really busy.**

**Like I will go to school at seven and will probably not get home until around eight. And that is on a good day.**

**I don't know how I will update but I will try my best. It will probably be a little hectic for a while.**

**Ohhh. I think I figured out what Joyness meant.   
Kakuri IS A GIRL!**

**Not a boy, GIRL.**

**Yes, I hope that cleared it up!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Yes, I know it has been forever, get over it.**

**I really don't care, because I am writing this for the only person who is actually reading it, my wonderful Thien.**

**So nana nana Booboo.**

**Hummmm, I would like to dedicate this chapter to my stupid school, which was closed today for the 5th time this year, getting me out of my choir concert and work.**

**Living next to a great lake does have some benefits.**

**Anyway, this chapter was supposed to be WAY LONGER, however, after typing it up THREE times and having my Dad delete them by mistake, I cut it down, so don't complain to me.**

**The good news is I finally know how to end this.**

**Yayayayay me!!!!!  
Anyway, on to the show and no I do not own it.(Naruto, not my story, own that)**

**XxXxXxXxX**

"Guys I would like to apologize, once more for my idiotic over bearing parents." I clicked off the mic.

My sensei yelled through his mic. That the lines were not supposed to be used for personal business, in the background Yuki laughed and I heard the unmistakable sound of a head smack.

I sighed and turned my attention to the barren road in front of me.

The day after the attack, my team and I were summoned to the Hokage's office, you read that right, my team.

Yes I have a team, although my parents blissfully hope I would have no aptitude for the Nin arts, I had surprised everyone and made genin with my age group, starting the program at the age of nine.

It rocks to be an Uchiha.

My team consisted of me (of course), Yuki, the son of Ino and Shikamaru, and lastly Suji, the son of Kakashi.

Yes you read that right too, Kakashi has a son.

To be more specific, Suji is Kakashi's adoptive son.

I have yet to figure out if Kakashi takes care of Suji, of Suji takes care of Kakashi.

Suji is one of the people I can relate to the most, because no one wanted him to become a Nin.

Cause Suji is blind.

His blindness is a side effect of his Kekkai Genkai, which more then makes up for his handicap.

Yuki is cool too, although he has no Kekkai Genkai, he got a mutated ability from his mothers jutsu that makes him sensitive to other peoples feeling, especially if they have been around him for a long time.

In fact, I think I would hang around Yuki a lot more, if it weren't for his sister. Yuki's twin is Hana, and just happens to be the girl I hate most in the village and my number one rival.

Stupid preppy girl.

Anywho, after my wonderful discovery, dad decided to send me on a mission.

This idea was from years and years of study. Naruto finally found out that if (after an attempt on my life) he tried to coddle me and keep me away from the big scary bad guys, well things tended to blow up.

So, the day after my Sharringan activated my team was sent on a mission, which I pretended was not a stupid farce and Dad pretended he didn't know I would set fire to his room this night in retaliations.

I sighed

"I'm bored." I said into the mic.

After three hours sitting in a tree watching a deserted road for something that wouldn't come I was getting antsy.

"Well, if someone didn't have a price on their heads." Suji muttered in his mic, I stuck out my tongue and gave him the finger.

"Kiba-sensei, lets do something fun."

Kiba roared into his mic. and told me to shut up.

I yawned widely and my jaw cracked, I rolled my shoulder and looked around.

Something was off, but I didn't know what.

"Yuki," I clicked my mic.

"Yeah?" Came the lazy reply.

'Do you feel that?" my tree shuddered, trying to buck me off, I gripped it until is stilled.

"Wow that was odd."

"What was?" Suji asked from his tree a little distance away.

"My tree," I replied, "it was shaking."

"No is wasn't"

But I didn't hear him; I was looking at my right arm. I had just felt something move on it. I slowly rolled back the cloth of my sleeve and sighed in relief.

Me and my over active imagination.

Man, I never thought I would actually be glad to see that stupid metal snake, I unknowingly stroked it.

Its head whipped around, gem eyes measuring me.

I stop.

Rubbed my eyes (with my left hand), and check again.

Yep, it was alive.

I then did what any self respecting Nin does.

I screamed my head off.

"GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!!!!"

I screeched in that high octave that only girls can reach and stood up on my branch and flung my arms around wildly, in vain hope of getting the snake off my arm.

Unfortunately I forgot the fact that I was thirty feet up, and my foot slipped.

My body quickly followed.

I didn't see a stinking light and the end of the tunnel; I didn't ever see a stupid tunnel.

My life didn't flash in front of my eyes, and I defiantly did not hear the voice of my dead grandparents.

I just fell, calmly taking in the fact that I was going to die.

As my body slammed into the ground, my last thought was at lest the blood snake would die too, before the fangs sunk into my arm, and I lost consciousness.

XxXxXxXxX 

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Mwahahahahahahah, finally Kakuri is a asleep and I shall carry out my evil plan to destroy the hidden leaf village.

**Love**

**lou**


	11. Chapter 11

Okay, chapter 11, yay me!!!!!! 

**This chapter is not going to be in the normal first person, but don't worry I will go back to the normal style. This story is going to be ending soon, only a few more chapters so yeah.**

**Okay, well I don't own Naruto.**

XxXxXxXxX 

Ten years latter…

Hana sat quietly at the side of the bed, carefully placing her large stomach so not to upset any off the important machines.

In the bed rested the pale Kakuri Uzumaki Uchiha.

Hana's biggest rival and closest thing she ever had to a friend.

"Idiot" Hana snapped at the girl, no reaction.

The doctors had said that talking would help, but that was ten years ago, and they had also said that Kakuri would wake up soon.

She didn't.

Ten years ago Kakuri had fallen from a high tree and lost conscience. She broke her right arm, shattered her left, broke her right leg in three places and dislocated her hip. She cracked four ribs and punctured the soft tissue of her lung. She had also cracked her skull and suffered from numerous bruises.

But she was alive.

After depositing their team mate in the hospital her idiot brother and Suji had ran off to kill Orochimaru, hoping that the death of the Sanin would waken their friend.

They left Hana alone.

Three years after their disappearance Suji and Yuki reappeared, closed mouth about anything that had happened on that fateful mission.

Still Kakuri slept.

Hana contemplated talking to the sleeping woman.

"Hey sand-snot" Hana winched, great start "Umm, lets see. I was told to talk to you, said it would help."

"Naruto still comes everyday to talk to you," Hana added "Just like clock work, so there's not really much I can tell you that you don't already know."

Hana's hand absentmindedly went to her large stomach

"You probably knew about this before I did." Hana laughed, "When I finally told your Dad he just blinked and asked if he was supposed to be surprised. Well it's twins; I bet he didn't tell you that. I know that you would probably tell me that it's horrible that I am bringing more of me into the world."

Hana sighed.

"This is so stupid." She hissed.

_You're telling me._

Hana smiled sadly, she missed the snot so bad she was starting to imagine her voice, a tear escaped Hana's carefully crafted wall of defense and splattered on the bed sheet.

"You know, if you get any snot on my bed, I'm gonna kick you out." Came a horse croak.

Hana's head shot up.

A glint in-between her lashes reviled the eyes closed for so many years where finally open.

Hana jumped up, chair falling behind her in a bang.

"Ka- Kakuri?"

"Who else?" The small nin asked hoarsely "Gosh Hana you're huge."

Hana just stood there then ran out of the room

"Naruto, Sasuke, she's awake."

XxXxXxXxXxX 

Kakuri felt as though a thousand pound elephant had fallen on her head and decided not to move for ten years.

The light of the room felt like daggers to her eyes so she kept them at slits and surveyed her room.

Gosh, what she would do for a glass of water.

It had been about twenty minutes since she had first woken up and Hana had run out to spread the good news. The first fifteen conscious minutes Kakuri spent in the world consisted of mostly numerous doctors arguing to see if she was really awake, or if was just the hormones.

_I don't have hormones _Kakuri thought, but choose to keep this to her self; it hurt too much to talk.

Familiar footsteps sounded outside the room, as the door was swung open ad Sasuke Uchiha stormed in.

The doctors rushed to his side mumbling a bunch of medical jargon Sasuke brushed past them and bent down to look at his daughter's eyes.

Kakuri swallowed painfully

"Wow, you're old."

XxXxXxXxX 

When Kakuri woke again she found it significantly harder to breath. When she opened her eyes she was starting directly into mournful dark blue eyes.

"Don't you know it's rude to stare?" Kakuri whispered, the little boy blink. Kakuri struggled to take a deeper breath, "Could you at least move? Your not light you know?"

The boy blinked again before climbing off of her stomach and running up to a chair.

Kakuri tracked the little boys movement to a chair where a blond haired person was sleeping.

Kakuri's throat tightened

"Da?" Nothing, louder then "Da?"

Naruto's headshot up and his blue eyes locked with his daughters dark ones.

"Kakuri? Oh my god, your alive."

"Yep" Kakuri managed a feeble grin "Your stuck with me for a little longer."

XxXxXxXxXxX 

Despite Kakuri's assurance that she was all right the doctor would not let her out of their evil clutches.

After a week of sitting around and doing nothing, Kakuri climbed out the window and escaped to the park. When she woke up she found Hana standing above her.

"I guess if you're good enough to scale a building your good enough to go home." And so Kakuri went home.

There was a lot of things that took a lot of getting used to, Hana for instance.

Apparently Hana was married, apparently Hana was married to Suji, who'd thunk it.

Yuki had also gotten married to one of Sakura and Gaara's kids and they were expecting their first child in a month.

And there was one more big change.

Kakuri locked gazes with her shadow

"You can leave me alone you know."

The small pale boy only blinked and didn't move.

"Don't mind him, he's afraid that now that you're here you're going to leave again."

Kakuri smiled at the pale boy.

"Who is he?" Kakuri asked her dad.

"Umm, he's your brother."

"…"

"Kakuri?"

"I'm fine dad, just learning to breath again, anything else you'd like to tell me?"

Naruto shifted uncomfortably

"Ummm, well this is Jaden and he is six."

The little boy with the same pale hair as Kakuri and Naruto's blue eyes blinked at his name, apparently he also got Sasuke's indifference.

"And he's our third child. You have a sister named Kaeda, she's ten." Naruto babbled "And she's missing, but don't worry we know where she is. And yeah that's about it, oh wait. I'm pregnant."

Kakuri took a minute to absorb this new information and gently smoothed Jaden's hair.

"You done?" She asked quietly

"Umm, yeah." Naruto laughed nervously and scratched the back of his head.

"Good, then I guess it's my turn." Kakuri reached down and picked dup her baby brother and placed him on her lap.

"Daddy, I'm pregnant too."

"… WHAT?????????"

"Okay Jaden look cute and unkillable."

XxXxXxXxX 

**Gasp, who got Kakuri pregnant??????????**

**Hehehehehhehe, I know, and I'm not gonna tell.**

**Yes I know unkillable is not a word, deal.**

**Okay, this is gonna be the last chapter for a while, the next chapter is going to be back in first person and will start diving into the mystery of who got Kakuri pregnant.**

**Love**

**lou**


End file.
